I have been trying to work through my anxiety for a couple weeks now. I have good days and bad days, but mostly for the last two weeks it’s been a string of bad days. Lots of worrying about things I have no control over, or no say in. Worrying how certain things will go. Worrying about things that have already happened.
Some of the things troubling me are legit, like school. The class I am taking for summer school, I am not doing so well in it. I keep forgetting deadlines, and procrastinating my work. Thankfuly I have a very understanding and flexible teacher. I have done 3 major assignments for this class, and every single one I have missed an important part of the instructions. I am grateful I have been given the chance to correct my mistakes and still get full credit. But this is so unlike me, and it’s been weighing on my a lot.
I have also been putting off some important things because I don’t feel like dealing with people. Like I need my hair cut, bad, and I need to figure out what I am going to do about the color.
I have a long history with Anxiety. But for the better part of the last 3 years I have had a pretty good handle on it. Like i said before, I have good days and bad days. And I am usually pretty good at pulling myself together and working through it. But recently it’s been harder. I have sought out help in the past. But right now my brain is telling me “you can do this on your own, you are going to be okay”
I am working on making some lifestyle changes, which include exercising more, because that seems to help. Plus I just feel better when I am outside moving. I have really shut out the outside world lately. I don’t want to go places, I don’t want to do things, I don’t want to talk to people. Because all those things give me anxiety. I worry about other people, I worry about home when I am not here, I worry about other peoples problems.
But I am working on it. I have two more weeks left of school. I hope to be able to focus a bit more here, and on YouTube, If you don’t follow me over there yet check it out. Lots of silly shit going on.